I've never been the type to lie about my age to make my self younger cause it's not the truth. The best path for me is to embrace me and all of me. Every flaw for God to fix and celebrate the beauty from Him within me. For me wisdom has come with age. I would NEVER want to re-live my 20's. I made so many mistakes and did things I regretted. In my 20's I thought I was invincible, not a care in the world. Jump off a cliff ...just for fun, somehow not thinking gravity would really effect me.
When I hit 30 years old I welcomed it and loved it. A new birth of a new decade (Lord willing). A chance to have a new outlook on life and I thank GOD, that has been true. Overall my life is very peaceful, I love my little girl more than myself and my focus is to raise her as a "good decision maker". The blessing of her in my life has improved me. Our kids are a reflection of us, so I've had to let the Lord tweek some things in my life that didn't encourage or benefit me.
I am thankful that my little one has only known a peaceful home and happiness. Lord willing I hope her life stays this way. I clubbed 7 nights a week in my 20's, VIP'd and drank the bar and when really tossed up drinks on me. So it was all out my system by 30.
I can only say God has been good to me and I've seen that he has brought me through many trials. Right now amongst my many projects is a "Counting My Blessings" Scrap Book. I felt I was divinely given this idea a few weeks ago to encourage me anytime I feel like my dreams (so many ) aren't going the way I think they should. I jotted down positive thoughts like:
Pastor Ron Carpenter: Somethings bother you that don't effect anyone else, like you'll see a homeless person and be all bent up, but the person next to you is not moved. Those are signs and indicators that your purpose in life is on those roads. Pay attention to the flashing signs, the things your passionate about or things that you wish could change and it makes you sick. THOSE ARE THE THINGS YOU WERE PUT HERE TO EFFECT & CHANGE.
Also, in 1999 I had a near fatal car crash, it was a rainy morning at 6 am on the 405N /101 interchange and my car spun out of control, after the 2nd spin, I let go of the wheel and hugged myself in a fetal position, I had a strange peace upon me about dying like it would be OK. My car was totaled off the embankment, I opened 1 eye and noticed I was not scratched or harmed. My door still opened I got out and walked up to the freeway. A young lady I used to know as a Bible Thumping /Holy Roller I hadn't seen in years, just happened to be on the freeway at that exact moment and saw what happened and wanted to see if the person in the accident was ok. It was me (I wasn't a follower of Yeshua aka Jesus... then) she told me "you're lucky and angels were with you I saw the accident and thought who ever was in the car was a goner". I did and greatful for life.
I hope this encourages you to make your own "Count Your Blessings" List or book just to encourage you on your life journey.
With Love
Kitty SonFlower
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